Bonne Arrivée Tats!

The past few days have most definitely been a whirlwind. In the best possible way.

I arrived in Cotonou, Benin on Saturday night around 8:30pm local time. The next hour was spent going through the process to enter the country and then waiting for my bags. I had arrived to Brussels from Chicago very early on Saturday morning, so my bags were obviously some of the first ones on the plane. Therefore, they were the last ones off the plane! I had a little Beninese helper. Men work at the airport for a living gathering people’s bags and taking them to their car for them. I felt bad for the guy! We just kept waiting and waiting. I finally got all 4 bags that equaled 200 pounds total and we were on our way through to the next room where they can search your bags if necessary and also make sure that your baggage claim tickets match the numbers on your bags. This helps decrease theft. One of my bags was of course chosen to search and I just laughed. I told the guard, “You’re not going to fine anything in there except clothes for a bunch of orphans in Sakete.” He say, “Oh! Ok. It’s fine. It’s fine.” And then tried to coax me into staying in Cotonou with him and not going to Sakete. No thank you sir. I have got an agenda to keep and you are most definitely not part of it!

Typically you walk out of this room with the guards in it into a large gathering room that loved ones are waiting in. This large room was completely empty! I look up at the clock. 9:22pm. Well, sure hope Ashley and Jon didn’t get tired of waiting for me and leave me. They were waiting outside where everyone has to wait now and could see me the whole time. I guess my face said it all! I kept walking toward the exit door and saw a mob of people gated off at the entrance. Still have my little helper guy with me pushing 2 of my bags on a cart and I have the other 2. I finally see Ashley first. Her little 5 foot nothing body is jumping up and down waving and waving. Then I see Jon and before I know it Mathias was right in front of me, busting through the crowd to hug his Tats. The second I saw Ashley jumping up and down I felt it. Home. I had felt it quite a few times within the last hour….

Butterflies in my stomach when the plane landed in Cotonou…

Being overtaken by the muggy, thick air when I walked out of the plane…

Hearing French…

Greeting everyone you pass with a “Hello!” or a “How are you?”…

And then Ashley, Jon and Mathias standing right there in front of me. I just kept saying over and over again, “I Cannot believe I am here right now!” It almost felt like a dream.

Some of the kids were on their way to Cotonou from Sakete to greet me at the airport and there was a problem with the taxi they were in. They arrived at the airport soon after I got out to the car and I just felt like I couldn’t get my arms around them fast enough. They had on their t-shirts I had made for them, all matching and just so darn cute I could hardly stand it!!!

We all left the airport to make the 2 hour drive to Sakete. We stopped by the orphanage on our way into town. It was midnight by this point and the kids were fast asleep! One of our cooks was waiting up and ran out to hug me. I went up to the house and woke up all the sleepyheads. Pretty sure most of them thought they were each dreaming. I was kissing them all over the place. Hugging them. Couldn’t get enough!

Jon took me up to show me the dorm. It’s so incredible. It was amazing, even by flashlight. All I could keep thinking is, when I was here this spring we broke ground on this project. And now, it’s this huge, fantastic home!! When I arrived last time that land was the soccer field and now it’s where the children will all soon be living. I was overwhelmed with gratefulness to be part of all of that. To be part of any of it, really.

How did I get so lucky?

To know these people. To know these kids. To be given the opportunity to help make their lives a little better. To be given the opportunity to love them. And to have them love me. And to have them make my life a whole lot better.

How did I get so lucky?

I am not sure, but that night when we arrived at Jon and Ashley’s apartment and I laid down for the first time in 2 days, my heart was overwhelmed with joy. I’m not sure how I got so lucky, but that night under the cool fan and dark sky of Sakete, Benin…my heart felt at home and I just felt extremely, extremely lucky to have this all be part of my story. 

(ash asked damien, "Did you find your Tata?"; he answered with a sleepy, "Yes!" and squeezed my neck a little tighter.)

Never Once

scars and struggles on the way

but with joy our hearts can say

yes, our hearts can say

never once did we ever walk alone

never once did You leave on us our own

You are faithful

God, You are faithful

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I am sitting in a comfy black, pleather sofa at the airport in Brussels, Belgium. A sunglass hut is in front of me with flip flips for sale out front. I was just sitting here thinking, "Why in the world are they selling flip flops in Belgium in December? It's cold out there". And then I quickly remember, I am in the "Africa" terminal. And let's be real, Africans love a good pair of flip flops. I know this firsthand. 

The past 36 hours are pretty foggy in my mind. There has been panic, laughter, tears, anxiety, restlessness, hugs, short tempers, peace, joy, sorrow...these are some of the emotions I have experienced since Thursday evening.

It all started with the "blizzard" in Chicago and talk of grounding flights, etc. I was set to fly in and out of Chicago on Friday to get to Brussels to make my flight to Cotonou. Usually delayed or grounded flights don't cause too much pandemonium but I freaked OUT when my parents told me at dinner on Thursday night that the news said Chicago O'Hare was grounding a lot of flights. I jumped up from the table in a panic. It wouldn't be that big of a deal, except flights only go into Cotonou, Benin from Brussels twice a week. So if i missed the flight in on Saturday, there would be no WAY I'd be there in time for Christmas. I was such a stress ball and so anxious. I got in the car to drive home because I wanted to call the airline and just burst into tears in the car. Kelli and Krystle were quick to assure me that everything would work out fine and sweet Evie was worried about her Tata being sad. The airline couldn't do much of anything. All flights were full. Plan was to pray the snow stopped and get to the Tulsa airport on Friday morning and pray all my flights were on time.

Thursday night was a mess of packing my 200 pounds of luggage and making sure no bag was over 50 pounds. I'm honestly not sure what I would have done without Kelli and Krystle there to help. Kelli and Evie flew in to surprise me on Thursday morning and Kelli's mad packing skills were very much appreciated. I probably just would have sat in my living room, overwhelmed, not packing, watching Elf and eating some comfort food that I shouldn't have been eating. But instead, all the packing was done by 10pm and I was in bed by 11:30pm. Fast asleep by midnight and pumped about 7 hours of sleep before the long 30 hour journey ahead of me.

I woke up at 3:45 to go to the bathroom and happened to look at my phone. I had emailed Jon and Ashley before going to sleep to let them know about the snow and possible plane mishap in Chicago, just so they'd be aware in case this Tata couldn't make the flight...I noticed that my nephew, Ryan, had tagged me in a post on Facebook at 3:30 and pulled up my Facebook app to see why in the world he was awake at 3:30am on a school night. The picture never pulled up. But the caption read something like, "guys, my house is burning down." I leapt out of bed and threw on a hoodie, my Uggs and bolted out of the house. My brother and sister-in-law do not live far from me and I rounded the corner to turn down their street and could see lights flashing. My heart was pounding. 

I had to park fairly far away from their house because the street was lined with firetrucks. A fireman was walking toward me, wrapping up a hose and I screamed, "IS THE FIRE OUT?". I didn't wait for him to answer. "THIS IS MY BROTHER'S HOUSE. HAVE YOU SEEN DOUG? DO YOU KNOW DOUG?". He gestured toward the house and said, "Everyone is fine. Doug was just over there. I just walked past him." Doug was walking toward me and he wrapped is arm around me. "Oh my word. What happened? Doug, are the boys okay? Is everyone ok?" He assures me, just as his fellow firefighter had, that everyone was fine. But that it is very, very bad. 

He had laid in bed with his wife and youngest son, Jake, and they fell asleep. So he got out of bed around 10pm and went to watch TV on the couch and fell asleep out there. Around midnight, he wakes up to this loud popping and it took him only seconds to realize what was happening. I am sure it's a sound he knows all too well, since he fights fires for a living. His house was on fire. He ran to the front of the house where Ryan's room is and as Ryan tells it Doug "busted through the door". He had to get his family out. He pulls Ryan out of bed, "Buddy, our house is on fire." They run to get Carma and Jake up. He hears Carma's cousin and her husband (who live across the street from them) screaming for them to wake up and get out of the house and they go out the backdoor that is attached to their master bedroom, they don't even have shoes on. A phone call is made to 911 on the porch and they run around the opposite end of the house to the street. Before that, they realize their dog isn't with them. So Doug goes back in the house and searches for him but by that time the smoke was too thick in the living room and he knew he needed to get out of there fast. He couldn't find Riley.

Jake, my 10-year-old nephew, told my mom and dad that he was running so fast over to David and Robbie's house that his feet never even touched the ground. They find shelter there but had to run by their home, engulfed in flames on the way there. A sight I know they will never, ever be able to forget. 3 different BA Fire Stations responded to the fire and were amazing in the entire process. I stopped my brother at this point in the story, as he's telling me it standing out on the street at 4 in the morning and said, "Oh please tell me they found Riley..."

For those of you who know this bunch, you know Jake Garrett loves that puppy dog. He was beside himself at the thought of him being stuck in the house and was wrapped up in my dad's arms on David and Robbie's couch crying when a fireman came in their house holding a soaking wet Riley. He was just fine. By the time I got into the house, he was fast asleep on the same couch but jumped up to greet me. No PTSD for that fella.

The loss is devastating. Really. All their belongings, gone. But I just kept sitting there, thanking God, that everyone was okay. Perfectly fine, for that matter. And that not one person had suffered any injury. It is just truly amazing that my brother was home that night and had fallen asleep on the couch. I can't even begin to let my mind wander to how different this scenario could have turned out.

As I got on my flight from Tulsa to Chicago, I turned on my iPod and it was on shuffle. The very first song that came on was a song by Matt Redman, "Never Once". We sing this song often at LifeChurch and it has quickly become one of my favorite worship songs. Some of the lyrics are at the top and bottom of this post. And they speak to my heart this morning as I'm sitting in the airport just like they spoke to me yesterday on the airplane and just like they do every time I sing them at church. Scars and struggles are on the way. We all face struggles. We all face situations that leave us scarred and broken and hurt. But my heart can always say, never ONCE did I ever walk alone through any scar or struggle I've endured. Never ONCE did He leave me on my own. He is faithful. Such a faithful God. And this morning I am thankful that He was faithful in protecting four of my favorite people on this earth.

We never walk alone friends. 

He will never leave us on our own.

We can turn our backs on Him. 

We can choose to not follow Him. 

But He remains faithful.

And this morning, in front of the Sunglasses Hut in Brussels, Belgium, I am so thankful for His continued faithfulness.

What can you be thankful for today? 

How is the Lord showing Himself faithful to you?

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every step we are breathing in Your grace

evermore we'll be breathing out Your praise

You are faithful

God, You are faithful

You Hold.

i'm currently sitting at my kitchen table in Oklahoma crying.
which, is not the best sign. honestly. i don't want to be an emotional wreck the next 48 hours!
i just watched this video one of my friends posted on Facebook and i started crying. CRYING!
i was a little tearful before watching the video, i'll be honest.

i bought an external hard drive last night to put all my pictures on from iPhoto. i have pictures on here that date back to 2005 and it takes up a lot of room on my MacBook. i decided it would be best to get all my pictures saved before heading back over to Benin tomorrow so my computer is working at optimal speed in a not so optimal setting. i was looking through some of the pictures as i transferred them over and a picture from Christmas 2008 jumped out at me. it's of my mom and dad with all 4 of their grandkids and it's precious. then i start thinking about how much each of the kids has changed in just 4 short years. and then i get sad that i won't be able to take a picture of them all together this Christmas.

 ((2008.))

that emotion quickly fled as other pictures came across my screen that brought up other memories. laughter. love. life.
and then i came across last Christmas' pictures.
my oh my. how much changes in 12 short months.

last december i had just finished graduate school. christmas was a whirlwind of parties, a graduation celebration, family Christmas, working at the Children's hospital, Candlelight Christmas Eve services, Christmas miracles (getting cancelled from work on Christmas eve!) and minimal sleep. i don't remember disliking any of it, i'm sure i enjoyed it all quite a bit. but all of that would leave me feeling very unfulfilled this year. because, a lot has changed in the past 12 months.

sure, i am sad about not being with my family for Christmas. but Christmas is crazy for the Gibson clan this year!! GG is in Germany with my uncle Raymond, aunt Bobbie and cousins (Julie, David and Carly). Claire is dancing on Saturday at the Texas state football championship game in Dallas at the Cowboy's stadium. people are coming and going. and i am getting on a plane tomorrow to go back to west Africa. a place that has my heart. my whole heart.

and this time last year, i couldn't have foreseen any of this. could not have even DREAMED any of this up, but it's happening. because when you surrender your life to what the Lord is calling you to...your life is no longer your own. so that's why i am not spending Christmas morning opening presents in my parent's living room and that's why i'm not going to a candlelight service at a wealthy church and singing Silent Night. i will be having my own version of "Silent Night" that won't be so silent because roosters wake up early and Beninese people are making all sorts of noise before sunrise, but i am ready to make some new Christmas memories. and i am thankful, that no matter if i'm in Broken Arrow, Germany or Benin, i serve a God who holds the whole universe and loves everyone on this earth.

((2012.))